Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Osama bin Laden...White House fesses up that terrorist was not armed! Children were in room when attack went down!

On the heels of accusations that all the true facts surrounding the death of known terrorist - Osama bin Laden - have not been forthcoming, a White House Official appeared at a press conference just moments ago in a deceitful sly effort to put the issues to rest.

In one startling revelation, President Obama's spokesperson acknowledged that - contrary to prior reports out of the White House - Osama bin Laden was not armed when he was shot in the head!

"He appeared to be reaching for a gun," he noted nervously, as he faced a vigilant probing press corp.

In addition, it was also noted for the record, that the woman - allegedly used as a shield - was not one of Osama bin Laden's wives.

More shocking, perhaps, was the disclosure that she was not allegedly used for the purposes originally stated by the Government.

Now, for the first time, the White House mouthpiece also fessed up that there were children in the bedroom when the clandestine full frontal attack on Osama bin Laden was launched on the compound.

Was that why Mrs. Clinton covered her mouth in shock as she watched real-time footage of the raid in the situation room alongside the President?

No wonder, handlers refused to confirm for the record, the precise nature of the footage that was being scrutinized when the infamous photo of the key players - President Barack Obama and Mrs. Clinton, for starters - was snapped by a White House photographer for future posterity.

Curiously, we learned for the first time, that there were also no armed guards on the premises!

When one reporter asked if enhanced interrogations of one witness in particular, ferreted out the precise information needed to get a scope on the wanted fugitive, the spokesman asserted that the insinuation was"strange incredulity".

Then, he proceeded to assert that it was a wealth of surveillance and intelligence data gathered over the years by dozens of agents and intelligence experts, that led to the capture and murder of Osama bin Laden over the weekend.

Some members of the press in attendance expressed their indignation that President Barack Obama's representative was seeking to downplay the role that others played in respect to the interrogation of one lone courier which they feel contributed to the end scenario.

In sum?

It appeared that the aid was seeking to negate any contributions that the George Bush administration contributed to the events that unfolded in recent days and subsequently led to the terrorist's demise.

"Just give credit where it is due," one reporter angrily retorted, in so many words.

Ah, the plot thickens!

News at 11!